Posted by: Uticopa in self help, big change on
Mar 24, 2009
Most people will probably admit to certain times in their working lives when they lack the motivation to do honest hard work.
If this relates to you, ask yourself honestly whether you're the type who has constantly cut corners, doing the minimum amount of work necessary for a certain project, and making excuses for handing-in papers late.
For many young people just starting out at work, there is the assumption that this tendency would end when they started doing a regular, paying job. However, in practice, this often proves extremely difficult - especially in a large, open-plan office where there may not be an obvious supervisor standing overseeing the job. In this sort of working environment, there are many employees who spend the majority of their time messing around on the internet, writing or even doing anything to waste time and not do the work for which they are being paid.
How to solve the stressful equations of life?
Rather like a stack of dominoes, once the bankers of Wall Street unleashed their economic ills onto an uncertain world, piece by piece, the world's economy started to collapse. Eventually, the unstoppable force reached the common man. But there were considerable knock-on effects on individuals, resulting in mounting stress levels.
Living in such unpredictable times evokes feelings of anxiety or even fear. There is a solution within each of us, but none of us knows what we're capable of until a crisis hits.
Of all the tools to combat depression and negativity, humour is by far the best medicine - for both patient and doctor! Television and radio are both under-rated as purveyors of exactly this kind of medicine, no data ever being collected on the numbers of sick people made to feel appreciably better by switching-on at home and laughing uncontrollably at the comic of the day. From the comedians of yesteryear like Laurel and Hardy or Jack Benny, to Tommy Cooper or that special brand of comedian today like Jackie Mason who use ethnicity to make us laugh - we all have our favourites. By watching other people's mishaps, we laugh and feel instantly better.
But, is there a scientific reason for this? Here are a few examples:
Humour combats fear
Posted by: Uticopa in self help on
Jan 16, 2009
If Spock were here, he and Bones - the good doctor from the Starship Enterprise - would cure all our ills. How simple it would be if only we could go back in time to fix all those ‘if only' situations, then zoom forward at warp speed to ensure a perfect future.
Despite the fact that this is the real world, modern technology has actually come up with some innovative ideas to help. There is a free website www.futureme.org which lets you send an email to yourself up to 30 years in the future! What a wonderful way to concentrate your mind and do something positive for yourself. By so doing, it encourages you to think about the person you would really like to be.
According to the website founder, most users fall into two camps. There are those who are trying to remember past experiences, so that they can learn from their mistakes, and others who are looking more to the future in order to set goals for themselves.
Posted by: Uticopa in therapy, self help on
Dec 30, 2008
The first thing to understand is that everyone's life goes through its ups and downs. Try to visualise one of those giant sequoia trees in California. As you stand at the root base and stretch your neck backwards, the trunk proceeds straight and true. Up, up it goes in a regular fashion until suddenly, without warning, there are two forks: one pointing one way, one the other. What to do? Which direction should you take?
So it is in life. A normal pattern is for your life to move along fairly smoothly, skipping over the inevitable knots and thorny problems on the way, until suddenly you encounter a major crossroads, one you have not encountered before.
Now, people who are emotionally healthy are in control of their emotions and their behaviour. They are able to handle life's inevitable challenges, build strong relationships, and lead productive, fulfilling lives. When serious things happen, as they will, they're able to bounce back and move on.
Posted by: Uticopa in self help, depression on
Dec 30, 2008
All my life I've been a pessimist. At least, that's what everybody tells me, so it must be true, mustn't it ? I was perplexed, therefore, to read in ‘The Times' that psychologists are at last coming round to the view that ‘constructive negativism' can be quite a good thing. Is this what I and many other people have ?
It all started with my paternal grandmother, who hailed originally from Eastern Europe. Her family, from the icy wastes of Lithuania, were long familiar with what we deem to be pessimism. It seems that those of us who descend from this part of the world are particularly prone to the syndrome, and now a genetic link has apparently been found. Of course, we all knew that really, deep down. There are so many of us who can recall our Russian/Polish grandmothers sitting with black scarves around their heads, despondent heads resting on a hand, giving that all pervasive and non-explanatory ‘oy' at all the injustices in life.
What a surprise, then, to discover that eminent researchers in the U.S. have been studying the syndrome and have come up with some surprising conclusions. Not only have they discovered a genetic link but also that to have a constructive negativism mindset is a good thing after all. How can this be, I hear you say ? We have long been conditioned, particularly by the Americans, to believe that optimism is everything. We must never be sad, depressed or despondent. We must instantly ignore the fact that there may have been a death in the family, for example, but jump up, smile, and get on with life.
Posted by: Uticopa in therapy, self help, depression on
Nov 25, 2008
Rising unemployment, negative-equity, house repossessions...is it any wonder many of us are feeling depressed and unable to cope? According to Mind, the mental health charity, as many as one person in five can expect to suffer from a mental health problem during their lives. With today's global financial meltdown, this figure can be expected to rise still further. So, what can be done?
First, you need to assess whether you are merely down in the dumps or actually suffering the classic signs of full-blown depression. Certainly, if you've been feeling blue for longer than a few weeks, you should contact your GP. If you feel that you would like to talk to a therapist who can help, you may want to consider contacting registered specialists through our site.
There are things you can do to improve your outlook on life: see below for everyday ways to help and remember, you're not alone. As many as nine per cent of the population suffer from mild to moderate depression at any one time.
Posted by: Uticopa in self help, mental health on
Jun 29, 2008
Psychologists believe that we all have different degrees of ‘self-efficacy’, which is our belief in our ability to succeed in specific situations – a belief, that all reactions to life challenges have an affect and a meaning.
Work on your Confidence and Self Esteem
Having good self-esteem provides a robust support system that enables you to deal well with day-to-day problems that can otherwise have a negative and in some cases detrimental effect on your emotional and physical health. Confidence and self esteem is something that you can work on and there are number of therapy and life coaching techniques that can help with that.
Make sure your expectations are realistic
Your expectations and judgement of a situation are very important when trying to create a healthy outlook and perception of any given situation. In psychology it is called ‘appraisals'. Situations such as ‘long queue at the Post Office' or a ‘traffic jam' aren't a problem unless you perceive them as such. When your appraisals are realistic, then you will be able to respond to daily challenges better and keep a sense of perspective.
Irrational Belief Systems
The ‘appraisals' you make come from your long formed belief system. If you have rigid and unrealistic belief system, then your judgement might not be suitable for the given situation. An indicator of the rigid belief system is when you often use ‘musts' and ‘shoulds' or ‘have tos', stressing importance of perfection, which is often difficult or impossible to accomplish (especially if your idea of perfection is distorted). 'I must be looking immaculate all the time' or ‘I always have to be liked by people around me'.